Monday, August 3, 2009

Mom Is A Blue Bell Copy Dog

Hello to my dear reader friends:

I got me some more pictures for my Blue Bell scrapbook and I made me some new Blue Bell friends. I want you to meet Ms. Kim Fowler in the blue shirt and Ms. Kelly Doss in the orange shirt. And well, that's me in the picture with my Blue Bell cooler and my Blue Bell hat. Now Miss Kim and Miss Kelly are some very nice Blue Bell ladies that brings the most delicious Blue Bell ice cream to the grocery store. They was mighty sweet to let me take their picture so's I could add it to my Blue Bell scrapbook.

Now I ain't real happy about having to take them pictures on a dirty sidewalk, onlyest dogs can't go in grocery stores. Now I wanted to get in that grocery store and put my paws in that cooler and have my picture made at the Blue Bell cooler. Now don't you see why we got to have us some doggie Blue Bell ice cream. So's I don't have to stand on no dirty sidewalk OUTSIDE being deprived of my Blue Bell. Now ain't that sad. And you see, that's why you got to be telling Mr. Kruse I got to have my Rottweiler Rocky Road and my Dog Gone Good Vanilla Bone, so's I could go in a pet store and buy my Blue Bell ice cream with some dignity. Cauze I don't like it when I can't go in no grocery store and pick out my own Blue Bell. And don't nobody care if I get my picture made in the pet store at the Blue Bell cooler.

Even iffen grocery stores don't like me, I reckon I got myself a purty good idea cauze now my Mom's being a copy cat. Well, not really cauze she couldn't be no copy cat cauze I ain't a cat. So I reckon she's a copy dog. Now my Mom's done decided Blue Bell needs to make more new flavors for humans too. See my Mom loves to eat ambrosia. Mom likes to be a vagrant most times. Now you see vagrants don't like killing animals to eat em. Mom mostly likes to eat veggitables and fruits. Now you see, I'm what you call a carnival, so's I'm spose to eat meat. And that's why Mom cooks me rosemary chicken. Now see if you got to kill sumpum to eat it, well's you spose to be what you call higher up the food ladder. Now I reckon since I'm taller than a chicken and can climb a ladder, I reckon it's okay to eat my rosemary chicken.

Now bout them new Blue Bell flavors for humans, well Mom wants some ambrosia and sumpum called pinya collata. Now I reckon this pinya must be different from pin the tail on the donkey if you spose to eat it. Now you see to make ambrosia, well you got to put some cherries and some little bits a pineapples and some pecans in that most delicious Blue Bell orange swirl. Cauze you see, ambrosia's gotta have oranges, cept Mom says oranges ain't too good frozen, so you just got to use some already made orange ice cream. And iffen you want one of them pinya collatas, well you got to get yourself some vanilla ice cream and you got to make it with coconut milk stead a cow milk and you got to mix in some lime shurburt with a little bit a pineapples and some coconut flakes and a little bit a rum flavoring, cauze you don't want no real rum in ice cream. Childrens and puppies ain't spose to have no alcohol and it ain't rightly good for humans neither.

And see, Mom's been thinkin folks don't much eat ice cream in the winter cauze its cold outside and folks want to eat lots a warm soup. So Mom says we need some Blue Bell winter ice cream too. Now if peoples could have some good vanilla ice cream with crushed peppermint candy canes, well folks just might want to leave a big bowl for Santa Claus, and we's could call it Santa's Surprise. Now since we love all animals, well I reckon we got to be thinkin about reindeer too. So's maybe Blue Bell could take some a that good green lime shurburt and put some red cherries in it so's it would look like Christmas and you could have yourself some Reindeer Delight. Cauze see I think reindeer eats grass anyway, so they would like green ice cream. Heck, when you live at the North Pole you gotta be use to cold, so reindeer would get a Christmas treat of some good Blue Bell frozen green ice cream stead of having to eat frozen green grass. And I reckon they would like them red cherries in that green ice cream cauze it would match Rudolph's nose. Yep, Mom's trying to steal my brains so's Blue Bell can make ice cream folks want to eat in the winter when it's cold outside. Onlyest, I tell you right now, iffen Mom gets her flavors fore I get my Rottweiler Rocky Road and Dog Gone Good Vanilla Bone, my feelins is gonna be hurt mighty bad.

Yep, I reckon I got to get back to work so's I can have my doggie ice cream first, fore Blue Bell spends so much time on humans, and we gets left out. And next time you go to one a them grocery stores that don't like dogs, well you just pick yourself up a carton of some good ole Blue Bell and you might just find me sitting outside And iffen you see one a them Big Blue Bell trucks or them nice Blue Bell workers, tell em Miss Roxie sent ya and they got to be makin some doggie ice cream so's all dogs can have ice cream and so's we could get Mr. Kruse to help all my homeless friends at Best Friends.

Have a Blue Bell Day, Love, Miss Roxie Rottweiler

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