Tuesday, July 28, 2009

Blue Bell Solves America's Health Reform

Hello to my dear reader friends:

Now if you been watching the news or readin the paper, well you knows everybody's talkin bout healthy reform. And everybody wants to be healthy now don't they. Cept how you pay them xpensive doctors is what you got to figure out. Cauze it costs lots and lots a money when you get sick, and I mean lots a money, more an most people make in a year.

You see bout two months ago I got really really sick, I mean really sick. The vets thought I was gonna die cauze my kidneys wouldn't work. I had to go to the mergency room and then I had to go see Miss Sara. Even Aunt Terry had to stick me with a shot to give me lots a fluids. Them vets asked my Mom if she had a place to bury me. Now that's purty sick and I was most scared. Mom was baking me rosemary chicken with little carrots hoping I would get well again.

Now you know what made me so sick. Turns out it was this dog food Mom bought at the pet store. Cauze you see I'm on a most special diet cauze I have to keep my weight down cauze I got bad hips. Well the pet store done run out of my food and Mom couldn't get none for a few days. Well she thought it would be alright if I just eat a little bit a that other pet dog food for a few days. Boy I won't never be eatin none of that food again. And you see I didn't have no health insurance neither and it costs Mom lots and lots a money to get me well again.

I don't reckon most dogs got health insurance, cept maybe them fancy show dogs or maybe some a them rich dogs. And you see, iffen you need to go to a vet when you get sick and got a mergency, well vets don't gotta see ya if you don't got no money. Only iffen you're a human, well a doctor's gotta make you well even iffen you don't got no money. So since I don't got no health insurance, Mom just had to find a way to pay the bill and it was lots and lots a money too. So you see, seems to me we got to get ourselves some dog healthy reform too. Cept I don't hear nobody talkin about doggie insurance. I'm not for sure why cauze we got lots more dogs than peoples. Seems to me dogs should get to have a vote about some healthy reform.

Well I reckon we ain't gonna get to vote or get no healthy reform, but that might not be too bad. Cauze you see Mr. Kruse and Blue Bell Ice Cream can fix the problem alright. Heck, maybe Mr. Kruse needs to be running for President cauze he could be fixin lots a them goverment problems and I'm gonna tell you how.

Mom knows lots a stuff bout dog food cauze she use to sell dog food. And there's lots a bad dog food out there peoples is buying and don't know it's bad. It wouldn't be nice to write about it, cept to say if you read the labels and knew what was really in some of the dog food you think is good for dogs, well you wouldn't never buy it again. Just cauze they say so on TV or just cauze

your vet says to eat it, you can't believe it's good. It ain't.

But you see when Mr. Kruse starts making Blue Bell Ice Cream for dogs, well then dogs is gonna be eatin good healthy treats and then they don't got a worry bout bad food, and gettin sick and xpensive vet bills and healthy reform. So you sees, Mr. Kruse can fix this here healthy reform problem. Cauze Uncle Sam sure don't know how to fix it. And it would be the most bestest solution. Cauze you see dogs don't get no social curity noways, so ain't nobody gotta rob social curity to fix our troubles. Nope. We just got to have Mr. Kruse get us some doggie ice cream so's we could eat healthy and stay well.

Now God give humans brains and they spose to have enough sense to know how to take care of their selves and knows what to eat and don't eat. Only dogs can't do that. We got to depend on humans to feed us. So Mr. Kruse don't gotta fix healthy reform for the humans, cauze they ought to have enough brains to figure it out. Well you see I got brains too, and I done figured out how Mr. Kruse can give us dogs some healthy reform and he don't gotta rob nobody to do it.

Now I reckon humans got enough sense to knows Blue Bell Ice Cream is the best ice cream on the planet and it's made with lots a good milk and eggs, so I reckon humans got enough sense to buy themselves some Blue Bell iffen they want some healthy reform. Now all we need is for Mr. Kruse to get our doggie ice cream in the stores and then we wouldn't be eatin no bad food made with byproducts and fillers. Cauze that's what almost killed me. Now iffen you don't know what byproducts are, you probably don't want to know, and iffen you did, you wouldn't never let your dog eat byproducts again.

Now my Mom will be most happy to share her rosemary chicken recipe for anybody that wants it. I was 12 years old in April and that's a mighty long time for a rottweiler, so I reckon Mom's doing something right and I got myself some good genes. So you see if dogs just have rosemary chicken and Blue Bell Ice Cream, well that's all the healthy reform we need. We not gonna be gettin sick and we ain't gotta have no healthy reform. Yep, when Mr. Kruse gets out own Blue Bell Ice Cream for sale, well the problem is solved. Peoples gonna get jobs and Blue Bell's gonna make money and Best Friends is gonna get some help for my homeless buddies.

So now you see why Mr. Kruse's just got to get that Blue Bell doggie ice cream out there. Cauze it's gonna fix lots of America's troubles, and best of all, I'm gonna have my very own ice cream flavors. I just can't decide which is better, Dog Gone Good Vanilla Bone or Rottweiler Rocky Road.

Now there's just one more thing you got to know. You see we got to get us what you call a advertising campane to sell lots and lots of Blue Bell Ice Cream for dogs. Don't you know I been doing my homework. We're gonna have us some Blue Bell Ice Cream bibs and we're gonna get ourselves some insulated little treat balls to hold our ice cream and we're gonna get our own doggie cone bowls and course we're gonna get Blue Bell doggie hats for our birthday parties and we're gonna get us some doggie Blue Bell T-shirts too. And since we're gonna be helping Best Friends, well we done got our slogan too. Cauze ain't nothin better than sharing Blue Bell with your Best Friend.

Now I gotta a little secret to share with ya, but you couldn't be telling Mr. Kruse, cauze he needs to be busy making my doggie ice cream, so's we don't need to bother him right now. But after Mr. Kruse gets our doggie ice cream in our pet stores, well guess what. Then we're gonna help Mr. Kruse make kitty kat cones too. Sorry cats, but you'll just have to wait your turn in line, cauze dogs thought of it first.

So iffen you want to be a good American and fix this healthy reform, well you just tell Blue Bell to get my ice cream in the pet stores. Then Mr. Kruse can run for President and fix this country, but not until after I get my Rottweiler Rocky Road.

Have a Blue Bell Day, Love Miss Roxie

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