Hello Again Dear Reader Friends:
I've decided that while I like to write, it can be a pretty lonely job just sitting here talking to all my friends, but my friends can't talk to me. So Mr. Editor Steve is gonna let me give you my email address, so's if you want to talk to me too you can. You can write to me at firstname.lastname@example.org. I sure would like to hear from all my friends out there. Maybe you could share with me your favorite Blue Bell story. Now if your moms don't let you have Blue Bell Ice Cream, well you could write to me and we could cook up a good plan to get you some Blue Bell too. You see with some moms, you need to look pitiful and bark alot, then you get Blue Bell if she knows it will make you be quiet. And some moms just like to spoil you rotten so you just give mom lots of slobbery kisses. So we'll just have to figure out together the best way to get you some Blue Bell too.
Now if we're going to be real friends, maybe you would like to know a little bit about my family. We got a mighty big family cause my human family all loves to rescue pets. Now as for me, I'm an only child now and I like it that way. I get all the attention, all the love, and all the Blue Bell. But even if I'm an only child, my goodness do I have lots of cousins.
Now my Uncle David has bunches of rescues. There is Prada, Bandit, Lucky, J.J., Smokey, Muffasa, and they just got a brand new kitty. I don't even know her name yet. She was found hiding under Allison's car. It's not hard to figure out how Prada got her name. She likes to play dress up as you can see from her picture. As for Bandit, well he's my biggest cousin, almost twice as big as me. He's not smart as me, but you see from his picture he wants to be. He thinks he can drive, but since his paws can't reach the brakes, he don't really get to drive. Now Lucky got his name cause he was so lucky to find a good home. He didn't want his picture taken cause he needed a bath. Now J.J., Smokey and Muffasa are cats (yuck) and they just wouldn't sit still long enough to have their pictures made.
Then there's my Aunt Sandra. She's got 13 cats, 12 birds, a turtle, and a dog. You have no idea how irritating it can be to try to tolerate 13 cats at one time. I know they gotta be my cousins too cause Mom says you don't get to pick your relatives. You can bet if I could pick my relatives, it sure wouldn't be cats and birds. Now the cats are Moochie, Corabelle, Francie, Cody, Gypsy, Katie, Bogey, Petey, Callie, Izzy, Smokey, Maxie and Little Bit. Boy is that a mouthful of furballs. Now Jonathan is one of those little weenie dogs. I think Jonathan must need to find a doggie sikitatrist cause he likes living with 13 cats. Something's wrong with that boy I tell you. I'm not allowed to play with all them yapping birds and I wouldn't want to play with those bird brains no way. They just make racket all day long and say the stupidest things. If I hear I want a cracker one more time, I'm gonna have me a bird for lunch. Why don't somebody just give him a cracker and shut him up. Maybe we could give him a big bowl of Blue Bell Ice Cream and it might be sticky enough to get his beak stuck together so's he would shut up. Wouldn't that be funny. Oh boy, Aunt Sandra would be so mad I'd have to spend a month in my time out chair. Now since it would be pure torture to photograph 13 cats surrounded by 12 bird brains, well, they just look like cats.
Well I got one more relative, at last count, and that's Mimi. She's a rescue and kinda looks like me, just not as pretty. But she is real sweet and lots of fun to play with.
So you see I got a pretty big family. Can you keep a secret? Don't tell my Mom I said this, but I think our family might be one of those disfunctional families Dr. Phil talks about. Cause I can't find no functions for them cats and birds except shedding fur and making too much noise. As for that little turtle, best I can figure is all he's good for is it gives them cats something to do, watch the turtle play in the mud.
I want to hear all about your families too. And if you have a disfunctional family, it's okay. Cause you can't pick your relatives either. So I hope you'll write to me at email@example.com. And if you're one of my homeless friends and you need yourself a family, well you could write to me to and send me your picture and I'll try to help you find yourself a good family. Now for you families who want to give one of my friends a home, you'll just have to promise to always have Blue Bell ice cream for your new best friend cause to not get Blue Bell is what you call cruel and unusual punishment.
Have A Blue Bell Day, Love Miss Roxie